Katharina Wilson is the author of the 1993 book "The Alien Jigsaw," in which she describes a lifetime of apparent alien encounters. Since 1993 she has also written several long papers that are posted at her web site, http://www.alienjigsaw.com/. One of these, titled "Project Open Mind," proposes that some apparent UFO encounters and abductions are physical events perpetrated by military personnel, possibly including mind control. However, Wilson is also convinced that she has encountered genuine alien beings.
Like many other people who claim alien contact, Wilson says her beliefs about religion and spirituality, as well as her impressions of her alien visitors, have changed a great deal over time. She describes some of these changes in a new paper titled "How My Beliefs Have Changed," posted on her web site. CNI News thanks Katharina for permission to quote from this paper.
Wilson says she had a fairly conventional Protestant religious upbringing, getting confirmed in the Lutheran church at the age of 13. "I went to church every Sunday until I was eighteen years old. I don't remember ever leaving church feeling good about myself or life in general. I was made to feel guilty rather than hopeful and uplifted," she writes.
At the age of 21, she returned home from college and lived for a time in her parents' home in Pensacola, Florida. She had won a scholarship to study music in college, having spent years learning to play several instruments. Her professors called her a "natural." She planned to become a professional musician. But all that changed when she saw the "yellow light."
On several occasions while in her room at home, Wilson says, she saw a yellow light moving around near the ceiling. She remembers being terrified by the light. After these occurrences, she discovered that her musical abilities had vanished. Though she struggled to keep playing when she returned to college, she and her professors all realized that her natural gift was gone. Somehow, the yellow light destroyed her dream of becoming a musician.
Only years later did she come to believe that the yellow light was a manifestation of alien activity. But while home in Pensacola, at the very time the yellow light began appearing, Wilson started to attend a Fundamentalist Christian church. Hoping for understanding of the terrifying encounters, she asked members of the church for guidance. They told her that the light was the spirit of Jesus trying to protect her from Satan. But Wilson didn't think so. Members of the church urged her to quit school and renounce her family. "I realized these people were dangerous," she says. Again, organized religion had failed her.
Things began to change some years later when she met her present husband, Eric. He had an interest in Edgar Cayce's teachings about spirituality. "I never joined a 'Cayce group' or got caught up in it, but from that time forward, I slowly began to develop an understanding of God. That was thirteen years ago," she says.
Katharina Wilson had been aware for years that she had an "unusual" life -- experiences that she would later recognize as alien encounter. These experiences became more frequent around the time she met Eric, and her encounter memories became more conscious. Then, in 1987, she read her first book about UFOs and the abduction phenomenon. "It seemed I finally had an explanation for my strange memories," she says.
In her 1993 book "The Alien Jigsaw," Wilson described dozens of encounters taken from her meticulously detailed journals. For the most part, she says, she felt ambivalent or neutral about the nature of the beings she encountered. But that has gradually changed. She now sees a major difference between so-called "aliens" and other visitors she calls "super conscious beings." She says that all of these beings can manipulate human perception, however. She holds out hope that the "super conscious beings" are actually as benevolent as they seem. But she is not sure of this.
The following is quoted from her paper, "How My Beliefs Have Changed."
"In 1996, I came to the conclusion that the aliens have taken much more from me than they have given. This realization began chipping away at my neutral feelings toward the aliens. I cannot speak for all of the beings who have interacted with humans, but some of these aliens have forced me and many other people to exist in a perpetual state of duress. Their interaction with us has ruined our marriages and careers; has caused health problems and, according to some researchers, even terminal illnesses.
"Living under such extreme pressure has forced me to look at my inner strengths for survival. When my inner strength is exhausted, I am forced to reach out to that which created me: God.
"I believe God is real and that God cares. However, I also understand that the decisions I make have a strong effect on the direction my life takes.
"During recent correspondence with hypnotherapist and abduction researcher Donna Higbee, we were discussing the subject of stopping abductions. The suggestions she provided were familiar to me. [Donna Higbee's article "What Would You Do?" is published on her web site at http://users1.ee.net/pmason.DH_index.html.] I had tried 'mental struggle,' 'righteous anger,' and 'protective rage,' and although it took about a year for these to work for me, I think they helped.
"I do not believe these techniques will work if there is even one molecule in your body that still wants to participate -- even if it is for the learning experience or for curiosity's sake. Unless every fiber in your body believes you really want them out of your life, they will know it and they will come back.
"Today, when I think I may be curious about them, I concentrate on God (or the Creative Force) and I say, 'If I need answers, or if I need truth about this phenomenon, it will come from God, not aliens.' It's a way to remind myself and the aliens that I am aware of the enormous manipulative abilities they have.
"The fact that I haven't seen any of the frail greys with the wrap-around eyes in over a year may be indicative that, at some level, they have heard my mental pleas and have felt my righteous anger and protective rage. Unfortunately, I continue to have experiences during which I see hybrid-type beings and, of all things, military personnel. ["The Alien Jigsaw" has numerous drawings of hybrid beings she has seen; and "Project Open Mind" details her apparent military encounters. See note at end of article.].
"In addition to these two groups, I continue to have benign experiences with beings I call 'super conscious beings,' or SCBs.
"During [one] unusual experience, I felt about the size of a canary compared to the two human faces peering down at me. It was a male and a female with white skin and black hair. At the time, I felt as if they manifested themselves to appear human for my benefit, but they were enormous. All I saw were their faces as they smiled down at me and questioned me about my health. While I was talking to them, their faces showed extreme delight when I told them I was a vegetarian and was healthy.
"This year I was visited by three of these beings two weeks before my beloved 18 year old cat passed away.
"These are not aliens. These beings have always been benign, either showing me a vision or interacting with me directly. The feel and 'flavor' of an experience with these SCBs, as I call them, is different from an experience with a grey, or a tan, or a hybrid, [and] also much different than my experiences during which I see military personnel.
"It is difficult to describe what the super conscious beings look like because they take on a human form that is best suited to the purpose of their visit. For example, when they show me a vision, I only see them in my peripheral vision. When they interact with me in a way that requires me to see them, they take on the form of a non-threatening human. For me, an elderly person is a good choice because I view most elderly people as more experienced than myself and deserving of respect. The only way I can describe the super conscious beings is to describe the emotions that flow from them: care, concern, love, wisdom, and peacefulness. If they had long flowing gowns and wings, I would call them God's angels.
"There are many people who cannot allow themselves to think of the aliens as anything but positive and 'here to help us.' I wonder if these people have only had experiences with the super conscious beings. I have had difficulty believing this regarding the aliens because of a lifetime of experiences with them. I have also refrained from calling them negative or evil until very recently, when I am in pain because of the lingering effects of their interaction with me. When I talk about 'aliens,' I am speaking of the greys, the tans, and the hybrids who have performed painful psychological and physiological experiments on me.
"I am now wondering what to think about these other beings who are visiting me from time to time. Who are these super conscious beings? I want to believe they are who I think they are.
"However, with what I know about the aliens' use of camouflage, screen memories and mind control, as well as our government's use of mind control on unwitting Americans, I wonder if it is safe to believe these super conscious beings are what they appear to be.
"Nevertheless, they are here and I know I am not the only human they are interacting with. Only time will tell, after we accumulate more information about them, what their true intentions are.
"It is sad that the more knowledge we gain about these different beings, the more questions we are left with. I fear sometimes that some of us will not be able to continue the mental, physical, and spiritual struggle this phenomenon requires of us. In the end, I fear some of us will be lost -- left with nothing to believe in.
"The thing that keeps me going is spirituality. I didn't get it from the Lutheran church or the Baptist church. It grew within me, probably because of my life experiences. God has been gracious to me: I have a wonderful husband and family, and although I experience pain from time to time, I have a healthy body. I also have friends who pray for me and I believe in the powerful and positive benefits of prayer.
"My involvement with certain beings has taken me into the spiritual realm and what I believe to be other dimensions. Unlike a lot of people on our planet, I know these realms exist."
[Katharina Wilson's 100-page paper, "Project Open Mind: Are Some Alien Abductions Government Mind Control Experiments?" can be purchased in printed form for $11.95 plus $3.00 p/h from Puzzle Publishing, P.O. Box 230023, Portland, OR 97281-0023. "The Alien Jigsaw," now available in paperback, can be found in many bookstores. If not available near you, email Katharina Wilson at kwilson@alienjigsaw.com for ordering information.]
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